Crazy old Maurice.

Greetings from the world of tomorrow!

Things are fine and dandy here in the future. It is Sunday evening and I have just returned from an outing in the Jinju hills. There were many nice views to be viewed from atop the mountain. We even stumbled upon a colourful temple on the way up. Korean temples are situated in the most random places. This particular monument of magnificence was lodged in between a high rise apartment block and a butcher’s.

It has been a very wholesome weekend. Jinju is a pleasant place to go hiking during daylight hours but the nightlife definitely leaves something to be desired. It is ever so difficult to find a bar. Most establishments that say ‘bar’ outside are actually karaoke bars that have a series of separate rooms where one goes with one’s party to sing. I’ve frequented said bars in the past but it helps to be drunk before entrance or you're likely to feel deeply ashamed of your lack of singing prowess. For the past two weekends in a row we’ve ended up in the same dimly lit underground tavern simply because it was the only bar we could find that was actually a bar and not a cheesy singing showroom masquerading as a bar. The first time we went there I was impressed by the laid back atmosphere and charmed by all the kitch paraphernalia on the walls. The place was strewn with brick-a-brac in the form of car parts, pictures, trinkets and the like. Not being a very observant lass it took me a while to notice that the place was in fact littered with naked anatomically correct Barbie dolls, that the apron hanging behind the bar had a pair of boobs on it and that most of the artwork actually took the form of crude pornographic sketches. There was also a large phallic sculpture hanging from the ceiling with two round light structures placed suggestively on either side that I had not observed the first time.  On closer inspection, it appears that we may have given our custom to some kind of untoward gentleman’s club run by a porn king and not a quaint pub with a convivial atmosphere run by a friendly local. Well it’s a mistake we all make at some stage in our lives I suppose.

We have finally finished conducting the speaking tests in school. Student answer of the week goes to the young man who when asked what he wanted to be when he grew up confidently replied ‘steak.’ We will get a break next week from educating the minds of tomorrow. The first day of the lunar calendar is on Feb. 3^rd.  This marks the beginning of the Korean New Year and we get three days off to celebrate!  It’s a very important holiday over here. The shops are currently filled with gift sets in honour of the New Year. Unlike traditional western gift sets that contain chocolates or fancy soaps most of these gift sets contain seaweed and spam. But sure whatever you’re in to.

In other news, I was manhandled this week by a tiny Korean man. He approached me on the street with his hand outstretched as if he would shake mine but when he got closer he gave me a hug and then grabbed my ass! Most ungentlemanly behaviour altogether.

I shall leave you now with some words - marmeduke, risible, foible, hoity-toity and finally, bouffant.